So, today was the first day of classes inside of the new performing arts building at my school. And while it’s a really nice building, it still feels a little off. There’s a feeling of loneliness inside that new building. There’s a overt push to show the building is fragile, and I can’t say I agree with it.
While I understand that there is a need to take care of nice, new things, some measures taken still seem a little overboard. Or, maybe not overboard, but possibly overbearing? Or just simply that there seems to be a divide between students and teachers. And our teachers, with whom we liked to think we had deeper relationships, seem to be feeling more like college professors, teaching to a lecture hall, and sitting in offices.
The whole building feels more like a college campus. And that’s not a bad thing. It’s just… different. And strange. And maybe my new found opposition to this building, and all the seeming pretension surrounding it stem from my knowledge that in only a few months, I’ll be off at college, and this world will seem like that of a dream.
I might be the one going overboard. I might be the one thinking way too hard about what’s going on here. But I do somewhat miss the old facilities. They were crowded, and not the most comfortable, or the most flexible, or the most forgiving, but it made a home and a community out of those that shared a common interest. And so far, I feel like that home, that community, that family that has existed up until now, which adopted me, took me in, and did everything it could to make sure I succeeded, is fading. It feels like this new building is not a home, but a monument. It is a testament to the fact that new buildings can be built, and families can be relocated.
I can’t wait to see this new building one day become a home. But I know it will take time. Plenty of time. I might not get to be a student here when I see the new building start being a home. All I can do is help work towards that.
So, in all honesty, my Daily Gratitude is for that family. I thank you, for all that you’ve done for me. And maybe we can become more of a family again. Until then, I will be paying my respects in notes on a keyboard.